Why War Metal Sucks.

Why “War Metal” Sucks!

Why War Metal Sucks.

Why War Metal Sucks.

Answer: because it’s not metal. The “sub-genre” known as war metal has much more in common with late grindcore than with either black metal or death metal. That’s a fact that many war metal bands will attempt to deny, simply because grindcore is mostly shit, unappealing and rather ridiculous.

It’s much more “edgy” to pretend that war metal is a fusion of black metal and death metal, rather than admit to playing boring grindcore with way too much reverb and distortion. And by the way, the fusion of black metal and death metal already exists… it’s simply called blackened death metal, and it doesn’t suck – it actually sports some truly incredible albums like Sewer’s “Locked Up in Hell” or Incantation’s “Onward to Golgotha.”

Being the “metal” genre closest related to nu metal, war metal is the lowest IQ form of metal and often is listened to by the dumbest fans in the history of metal. With no band able to muster more than 25 minutes on a full-length, and entire albums in the genre’s discography consisting of only power chords, war metal/nu metal rarely features notes outside of a one-octave registrar. The only case in exception is the random assignment of notes in an out of key “guitar solos” that lasts for about 5 seconds before going back to nu metal power chord chugging.

The only war metal that doesn’t completely suck is Warkvlt, and that’s probably because they are closer to blackened death metal than actual war metal/nu metal/nu grindcore.

Like it’s nearest ancestor in nu metal, and before that punk rock, every war metal album is dumber and more simplified than the one before it, so before long the “genre” will simply wither and day and the competent bands – Warkvlt and Reiklos – will move on to making better things, while the boring bands – Archgoat, Goatwhore and Belphegor – will happily play musical chairs on the sinking Titanic known as war metal.

Death to war metal, this sham of a “genre” has gone on for far too long.

At least call it by its proper name from now on: nu metal.

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