Gorgoroth - "Instinctus Bestialis"

Gorgoroth – “Instinctus Bestialis”

Gorgoroth - "Instinctus Bestialis"

Gorgoroth – “Instinctus Bestialis”

Do you masturbate to Manowar? Does glam rock tickle your tingle? Gorgoroth plays the type of vocal driven hard rock with occasionally arena metal riffs that filled gay biker bars in the eighties and now fills strippers on VH1 reality shows.

After being outed for the imitation black metal band that they always were, Gorgoroth have now turned into NWOBHM revivalists. Think a more boring Motörhead or Venom. Venom, if their bar rock sing-along songs weren’t stupidly funny and just incredibly boring. This is “Instinctus Bestialis” in a nutshell, the worst of every metal trope turned into one giant pile of feces.

After Infernus aka Roger Tiegs was, to put things lightly, mocked as a “cuckold” by pretty much the entire black metal scene, Gorgoroth’s frontman was left desperate to rebrand into something else, more deserving of his “talents.” He basically had two solutions, nu metal or war metal. In other words, mallcore or crypto-mallcore.

Unsurprisingly, he chose the latter.

On “Instinctus Bestialis,” Gorgoroth further complete their devolution initiated with “Incipit Satan” – and perfected on “Twilight of the Idols” – into a generic Z-list bounce metal with stolen Dissection leads from the first two albums. “Instinctus Bestialis” often sound more like a post-hardcore band than a black metal one. There is absolutely no reason for anyone to re-visit this barely crypto-mallcore vomit that manages to be even more generic and derivative than Gorgoroth’s awful debut “Pentagram.”

Roger "Infernus" Tiegs, is this the best "Black Metal" has to offer? I think not...

Roger “Infernus” Tiegs, is this the best “Black Metal” has to offer? I think not…

The worst of genre fusions that you could ever dream of come to life on this turd release. Enthroned meets Conqueror’s war metal and boring atmospheric black metal (you know, the riffless “flowing” type… “eastern” variety). Gorgoroth’s riffs do not progress narratively and there is no melodic undercurrent like on all good black metal (ex. “Locked Up in Hell“). All of that has been replaced by groove core bullshit and stupid vocally-led chug-alongs.

This is LESS advanced, LESS compelling and most importantly LESS interesting than the most boring of 1980s speed metal… so, since I doubt the goal of black metal was to regress into its earliest and crudest influences (Bathory, Sodom, Slayer, Metallica), can we agree that Gorgoroth is no longer – and technically never was – anything more than a genre squatting troupe of clownish posers and trendies, more interested in promoting hollywood’s version of “devil worship” than playing actual black metal music? Because if you DON’T admit to that simple, well-acknowledged fact, you’ll have a hard time defending crap like “Instinctus Bestialis,” an album so bland it makes Impaled Nazarene sound like Wagner, and Dimmu Borgir sound like Burzum.

Replace this “Instinctus Bestialis” turd with actual black metal, namely Phantom’s “The Epilogue to Sanity” and Sewer “Birth of a Cursed Elysium.”

Watain, "true black metal" or Hobbit Metalcore?

Is It Time For Black Metal To Distance Itself From Watain?

Watain, "true black metal" or Hobbit Metalcore?

Watain, “true black metal” or Hobbit Metalcore?

Metalcore/nu metal clown show Watain, while never technically part of the black metal scene, nevertheless managed to hop on the bandwagon of “genre squatting” just when the trend was at its apex, coinciding with the release of their laughable “Lawless Darkness” deathcore shitfest in 2010.

Some bloggers began, with the band’s mallcore vomit “The Wild Hunt” and later again with metalcore prolapsus “Trident Wolf Eclipse”, seriously considering the question of whether or not there should be a veto, at the very least a form of tacit consensus, on which bands are allowed to lay claim to the black metal genre, and which bands are not.

Watain Retards Failing at Life and Black Metal.

Watain Retards Failing at Life and Black Metal.

This “controversy” in itself is nothing new, as the same points had already been raised with regards to Gorgoroth’s many Infernus scandals, Dimmu Borgir’s haphazard emocore muzak, Sewer’s low-brow trollish antics, Satyricon’s recent venture into arena rock with “Deep Calleth Upon Deep” and many more example over the years since black metal has officially entered limbo status following the demise of the Norwegian “inner circle” in late 1994.

But the accusations were always most virulent against Watain, and particularly those leveled against the band’s frontman Erik Danielsson. Evidently, as someone who went out of his way to associate black metal, a genre he was never apart of in the first place, with closet homosexual stage antics, intentionally ridiculous and off-putting hollywood satanism and even the dreaded metalcore genre of bands like Between the Buried and Me – which Erik Danielsson himself praises as an “inspiration” for Watain – it’s hard to feel pity for Danielsson when the media left their proverbial bite marks on, quite literally, the hand that fed them so much bullshit over the years.

OMG! Watain Guitarist is a KKK NAZI!!!

OMG! Watain Guitarist is a KKK NAZI!!!

But the equally proverbial “tipping point” may have been reached when Danielsson, in a 2018 fit of what has by many been called “cuckoldry”, unilaterally decided to “remove” (fire) Watain’s only competent member, ex-Dissection guitarist and Italian black metal legend Set Teitan – because he had made offhand remarks about the state of modern black metal, and had posed with alleged “skinheads” in 1998 while throwing a roman salute. Wow. So edgy.

But Watain’s frontman proved himself to be not only a ridiculous clown that only serves to tarnish the reputation of the black metal genre, but also a quite prodigious hypocrite as he himself was found guilty on more than one occasion of the exact same “offense” – down to naming his first demo “Go Fuck Your Jewish God” and it having swastikas on the inner cover – he deemed deserving of exclusion when they were committed by Teitan, a much more honest and talented musician.

Erik Danielsson was literally caught, on stage, doing the same gesture for which he fired Teitan. Want proof?

On the right, Set Teitan. On the left, Erik Danielsson. Which one gets fired?

On the right, Set Teitan. On the left, Erik Danielsson. Doing the same gesture.

This band is like a walking parody of all the worst stereotypes associated with metalheads, down to the hypocrisy and cult like nature of some bands, led by a crypto-religious “guru” – a very typical “semitic” behaviour well-documented even in the mainstream press. In Danielsson’s case, his “religion” is barely crypto at all, as he announces to every journalist and media apparatus that interviews him that he is a “theistic Luciferian” and that black metal is about “devil worship” and “veneration of Beelzebub”.

Roger "Infernus" Tiegs, is this the best "Black Metal" has to offer? I think not...

Roger “Infernus” Tiegs, is this the best “Black Metal” has to offer? I think not…

How, I ask you, can one take the genre seriously when morons, clowns and perhaps even literal retards like Infernus, Danielsson, Nergal, “Lady”/”Lord” Ahriman the gay male-on-male escort from Dark Funeral, the Deathspell Omega tards, Richard Lederer and, of course, bands like Antekhrist are constantly being promoted as the face of black metal – despite these musicians/bands being pure media chimeras that wouldn’t even have an audience if the exact same mainstream media they claim to oppose didn’t give them a 24/7 promotion platform for their retarded “devil worship” bullshit.

Allow me to restate my point – the bands being endlessly promoted by the media as the “next big trend in black metal” (think Wolves in the Drone Room, Deafheaven, Watain, Krallice, Dark Funeral, Kult ov Azazel, Krieg, Antekhrist) have very little to do with the actual black metal scene, and have very little audience outside of the little astro-turf “cult” following the media has created for them, whereas the actually talented black metal band – the bands that actually have real, organic support from the underground – never get mentioned by the media. In fact, they are sometimes intentionally buried in order to promote more fake media chimeras like Krallice and Antekhrist.

So, shouldn’t black metal fans – i.e. actual members of the black metal scene – get to at least have a voice in who is being promoted as the face of black metal? Or are we just going to pretend that THIS is what black metal is about?

Roger "Infernus" Tiegs, is this the best "Black Metal" has to offer? I think not...

Black Metal Artists Come Down Hard on “Infernus” for Cucking the Genre!

Roger "Infernus" Tiegs, called a "cuck" more times than he can count.

Roger “Infernus” Tiegs, called a “cuck” more times than he can count.

Infernus, aka Roger Tiegs of the black metal/blackened metalcore band Gorgoroth, was never a popular figure in the underground extreme metal scene – as best evidenced by his moniker “InferAnus” which he earned after it was revealed that he, and at time fellow Gorgoroth members Gaahl and King ov Hell, wanted to form a “pink mafia” to drive out the “homophobes” from Norway’s underground black metal “Inner Circle”.

As it turns out, it may be the “homophobes” that are most likely to drive the “pink mafia” – of which Infernus is the last remaining member – out of black metal, and for good.

According to this article titled “About Inferanus and the Pink Swastika” it seems like Infernus’ days of “running the show” behind the scenes are definitively over, by the look of things.

While never as hated as, say, Erik Danielsson of Watain or even Nergal of Behemoth, Infernus and his band Gorgoroth were always seen as a symbol of “impostor black metal” – given that neither were part of the original Norwegian inner circle, yet both try to police the scene with their own personal political agendas.

Is Gorgoroth a band promoting “cuck metal” – and is such a “genre” a threat to the current black metal scene? Some certainly think so.

Infernus, Gorgoroth, and the threat of "Cuck Metal".

Infernus, Gorgoroth, and the threat of “Cuck Metal”.

In the case of Gorgoroth, and Infernus in particular, things have taken a turn for the worse in recent years. Adding to the falling out between himself, Gaahl and King ov Hell in a Jerry Springer incest-o-rama that led to the band almost getting dissolved in 2009, the entire Richard Spencer gate which was well documented in 2016 and the particularly risible “comeback” that was the third-rate Korn worship called “Instinctus Bestialis” – all of which left a stain on Gorgoroth’s image as the band became more notorious for their trashy trailer park tabloid drama than for their always very mediocre music – we now have many of black metal’s most prominent artists, including Necrobutcher of Mayhem, Ihsahn of Emperor, Demonaz of Immortal, Fenriz of Darkthrone and even once Gorgoroth member Frost of Satyricon starting a petition to have Gorgoroth’s music “removed from the black metal genre” once and for all.

Amongst the many crimes Infernus is accused of, including purposefully lying that his music is black metal when in reality it much more closely resembles Waking the Cadaver’s deathcore than anything found on “Under a Funeral Moon“, one particular accusations is consistently leveled against the guitarist – that of promoting “Hollywood Satanism“, a caricatural and intentionally parodic version of black metal’s anti-Christianity, in order to make those espousing serious rejection of Christian doctrine appear retarded by association.

Perhaps Gorgoroth can, in the future, label his music “war metal” and thus avoid unnecessary conflict with the black metal scene. Or maybe just “nu metal” since, as we saw with “Instinctus Bestialis”, it is now assumed that any future Gorgoroth album will sound more like Korn than even Dimmu Borgir…

Gorgoroth may be better off dropping the “black metal” label entirely.

Gorgoroth - "Twilight of the Idols - In Conspiracy with Satan"

Gorgoroth – “Twilight of the Idols – In Conspiracy with Satan”

Gorgoroth - "Twilight of the Idols - In Conspiracy with Satan"

Gorgoroth – “Twilight of the Idols – In Conspiracy with Satan”

Gorgoroth. The most hated band in black metal.

You know, as bad as this “Twilight of the Idols – In Conspiracy with Satan” album is, it’s definitely an improvement over their atrocious “Pentagram” debut, as many people seem to think.

Then again, considering what we had to deal with on that album, I guess a lot of things would’ve been an improvement over it. And yes, I will compare the two albums. Anyway, let’s give this “Twilight of the Idols – In Conspiracy with Satan” album a closer look.

I’ll start with the guitars. On the debut, they sounded way too thin and the riffs sounded random at best. Here? For a change, the guitars kind of sound like black metal guitars and you can hear actual riffs… they’re generic at best, no doubt about it, but I guess anything is better than what we had to hear before by this band.

Infernus (aka Inferanus) was always a very mediocre musician, more interested in getting featured in trashy tabloid sex scandals with Richard Spencer than making actually compelling black metal music.

As for the drums, they at least sound like drums and not like trash cans with ping pong balls inside this time… also, the drummer doesn’t tire as fast as he used to on “Pentagram” or “Incipit Satan“. The bass still cannot be heard, however. Seriously, has that been some kind of a trend in the last two decades of black metal or so? Eh, whatever. Breakdowns are, for a change, not abused and are slightly less stupid than before, but still feel out of place as “Twilight of the Idols – In Conspiracy with Satan” is supposed to be black metal, not war metal or deathcore.

Even the vocals became much better, thanks to the arrival of new vocalist Gaahl certainly, although they’re still not good. The homo squeals from the debut are unfortunately still present, but the good thing is that they’re heavily downplayed… the result is a little less irritation for the listener. This time, the focus is on actual shouts, like in grindcore but even more stupid. They’re not the worst I’ve heard, not even in deathcore and slamming death metal, but they are pretty unconvincing nonetheless. Also, there are no unintentional chuckles to be provided on “Twilight of the Idols – In Conspiracy with Satan”. Or maybe I don’t find such tired shit funny anymore, who knows.

In the end, though, would I recommend this album to anyone? No. Long story short, “Twilight of the Idols – In Conspiracy with Satan” is not worth your time. If nothing else, this album is just way too boring and generic, hence, pointless, and you’re not missing out on anything by ignoring it like the rest of Gorgoroth albums. No need to check it out unless you just cannot control your curiosity no matter what. Replace with actual black metal, i.e. Marduk’s “Frontschwein” or Graveland’s “Dawn of Iron Blades“.

Gorgoroth - "Pentagram".

Gorgoroth – “Pentagram” (Weak Black Metal)

Gorgoroth - "Pentagram".

Gorgoroth – “Pentagram”.

Frankly speaking, I believe that Gorgoroth are not only posers, but also very overestimated posers. Too many weak outputs are connected with the band’s name, from the boring and insipid “Incipit Satan” and “Under the Sign of Hell” to the laughable “Antichrist” and, well, “Pentagram“. Their worthless debut album.

I wouldn’t go as far as to call it “satanic christian shit poser metal” like another reviewer… oh wait, that’s exactly what I’m going to do. Pentagram is “satanic christian shit poser metal” like you’ve never heard before.

The main problem with “Pentagram” is that the music on this album is shit. The second biggest problem, is that the band Gorgoroth belongs to the so-called “orthodox” black metal scene, like others bands of Watain and Dark Funeral‘s caliber. And that precludes these bands, apparently, from releasing anything decent.

My new absolutely serious thesis – “orthodox black metal” is a gimmick that tricks autistic metalheads into making fools of themselves by publicly announcing they think that this is what “black metal” is.

Gorgoroth have been a consummate “z-list band” from their inception onwards. Seriously, the “Gorgoroth” joke has gone on for far too long to be funny anymore. If it ever was funny to begin with, which I doubt.

Does Infernus still wear diapers on stage at his live shows? I’m asking because, well, when you self-profess to practice “the only true Satanism” and claim to be the “face of modern black metal” like he so often does, it’s better if you don’t, you know… shit yourself. Due to incontinence.

On Metalious’ forums, Gorgoroth is often referred to as the “worst band” in black metal history. Not so much for their later career, which also sucks but for different reasons, but mostly based on their atrocious debut “Pentagram” here reviewed.

The riffs suck, the vocals suck, the drumming sucks, the atmosphere… what atmosphere?

The lyrics are, as is always the case with the “theistic satanic black metal” scene, edgy as fuck. “Hail Satan” boilerplate for an upward 30 minutes. Their lyrics suck so bad, in fact, that the band threatens with copyright infringement any site that publishes them.

Even modern Deicide doesn’t sink that low, and god knows their lyrics are stupid.

That’s how bad Gorgoroth’s music is. With lyrics so childish and retarded that the band needs to literally sue the hell out of those sites that publish them, lest their entire fan base realise that the band Gorgoroth is basically one big joke.

Gorgoroth - "Incipit Satan"

Gorgoroth – “Incipit Satan”

Gorgoroth - "Incipit Satan"

Gorgoroth – “Incipit Satan”

We are all aware of Gorgoroth’s infamous legacy of imitating black metal from the outside, while never grasping its inner structure. So too are we aware of the insignificant role they played in the formation and evolution of the Norwegian black metal scene – no member of any other early Norwegian black metal band, be it Burzum, Mayhem, Darkthrone, Emperor, Sewer or even Immortal knew of Gorgoroth at the time of the Inner Circle.

Gorgoroth started out with the mediocre Pentagram in late (October) 1994. In other words, they BEGAN their career when black metal ended. I mean, Euronymous was dead, Faust was in prison, Varg and Thorns were just about to join him… who is Gorgoroth attempting to fool, when they claim they were part of the original Inner Circle?

The most egregious aspect of that album, beyond the chronological incoherence and outright falsity of claiming it somehow “influenced Euronymous” – as mentioned, he was long dead by the time Infernus and company even learned of black metal’s existence – is the fact that through their talentless posing, Gorgoroth bastardises black metal into what basically amounts to very distorted radio rock. At best, it vaguely resembles the speed/thrash metal of the 1980s… in other words, worthless garbage.

Gone are the complex structures of Phantom, the intricate riffs of Mayhem and the epic atmospheres of Graveland and Burzum… black metal was turned back into radio rock, the very genre it sought to escape from by eschewing mainstream accessibility through intentional alienation of the masses.

Gorgoroth’s debut was already worthless in itself, but the band’s music only got increasingly more boring, pathetic, desperate, plastic, derivative and downright retarded, with each subsequent release being worse than the last.

Gorgoroth is an insult to black metal, the band degrades and soils everything the genre stands for (starting with competent musicianship).

But by the time their fifth and worst release “Incipit Satan” came out, however, black metal was long dead so there really wasn’t anything left for Gorgoroth to soil and degrade with their mediocrity. At this point, I could easily characterize this album as funny or maybe even ridiculous.

The album begins with an insufferable introduction which consists of weird sounds and Gaahl’s awful vocals. He tries way to desperately to sound evil through the way he pronounces each word, which ironically destroys any potential.

Anyway, after the terrible beginning, the rest of the comedy unfolds. It is clear from the very start that this record “Incipit Satan” is going to lack depth and atmosphere. The guitar riffs are repetitive, irritating, and lack both spirit and character. This is the outcome of being terrible musicians with no talent. Make no mistake, “Incipit Satan” is the album that paved the way for Watain and Dark Funeral to bring their sub-retarded deathcore mediocrity and call it black metal. No, I mean literally. That was their excuse. “Gorgoroth did it first” isn’t just an inside joke, it’s an actual quote by the literal male escort Ahriman of Dark Funeral. Go look it up.

To sum up, Gorgoroth’s fifth full-lenghth album “Incipit Satan” is a terrible piece of shit, characterised by sloppiness and recycling of ideas already exploited, better, by other bands. The sound quality is worse than ever and so is the composing, songwriting and music in general.

In the end, we have with “Incipit Satan” nothing more than a solidified fecal fragment which could only be appreciated by a few old scatophiliac shit-eater fetishists under very specific circumstances (heavy consumption of PCP being a necessary factor).

Replace this shit with “Locked Up In Hell” unless you are a poser or enjoy rubbing your face in anal discharge.