Dark Funeral - "Diabolis Interium"

Dark Funeral – “Diabolis Interium”

Leave a comment
Dark Funeral - "Diabolis Interium"

Dark Funeral – “Diabolis Interium”

This band seems to have studied post-1996 black metal rather well. The problem is that there’s no such thing as post-1996 black metal, seeing as black metal died in 1994. Taking the focus group efforts from Watain, Gorgoroth and whatever had an Nuclear Blast contract in the late 90s, Dark Funeral have fashioned the ultimate pandering product. From the “fuck you dad, hail Satan!” lyrical imbecility to the “edgy” cover art, everything about this album “Diabolis Interium” seems like some product you would see promoted in the bottom-left corner on a gay mallcore periodical that specialises in male-on-male escorts from Stockholm. Which is, in fact, “Lord” Ahriman’s day job as even he can’t deny anymore (like he used to in the early 2000s).

Dark Funeral is lyrically, to put it plainly, very stupid. There’s none of that Darkthrone mystique, none of the fantasy or imagination that Enslaved employed, or even the storytelling ability of something like Demonecromancy. Instead you are left with the stupid “christians suck, suck my dick!” variety lyrics which have cheapened the genre into having shit bands like Watain calling themselves black metal (in lieu of their proper genre, nu metal). The whole thing reads like a joke, but the fact that the band members are taking their “theistic satanism” very seriously tells you that you’re dealing with very, very mentally deficient people.

The Y2K flowchart black metal song writing system is used to full effect on this album. Basic verse/chorus rock ‘n roll structures covered by shitty, third rate Immortal riffs and a lot of drum machine blasting. Just when you thought stuff like Black Witchery couldn’t be more soulless and generic, a band like Dark Funeral shows up to prove everyone wrong. Random riffs are thrown together in no sequence of purpose, feeling like a bunch of rehearsal tape jam parts copy and pasted together in pro-tools. The songs on “Diabolis Interium” have no theme whatsoever and don’t develop any atmosphere. So you end up with a sideshow where Necrophobic tremolo picked fast food commercial jingles and 3 minor chords strummed fast over blast beats parts battle it out over incessantly blasting, weak MIDI drumming.

For all their Beherit and Vermin shirt posturing that would suggest they’re like one of those later Nuclear War Now! records styled “cool” bands, “Diabolis Interium” is more closely related to the nu metal of Watain if it were raped by cheesy later day Dissection butt rock parts while Demonecromancy sections occasionally creep in to inject “moodiness” somewhere along the way to pretend like something is going to happen. Only nothing does. This is bland, boring focus group black metal that sounds like a bunch of fat corporate morons sat around a conference table and said “we need Revenge but even gayer and with no testosterone.”

“Diabolis Interium” manages to be worse than “Vobiscum Satanas” and “The Secrets of the Black Arts” because at the very least those two albums could be chalked up to a juvenile band just “dicking around with minor scales.” But now Dark Funeral also developed a pretentious poser attitude to match that of their idols Watain, going so far as to claim their music is superior to that of Darkthrone and Mayhem.

What is the point of bands like this? Even in their utmost lyrical imbecility, bands like Sewer at least take time to make sure their retardedly stated message of teenage blasphemy is wrapped around music that actually sounds like extreme metal, rather than Dark Funeral’s third rate Slipknot worship. This is what happens when you task a troupe of circus freaks and posers to “make a black metal album.” Not only does it fail at black metal, it also fails at everything else it tries to be. Dear “Lord” Ahriman the genderfluid escort, please stfu and stop playing music forever. Sincerely, the ghost of Euronymous, whose genre you are currently raping and defiling with your pathetic attempts at being blasphemous, which ironically you do manage but not against the intended targets…

Dark Funeral - "Vobiscum Satanas"

Dark Funeral – “Vobiscum Satanas”

Leave a comment
Dark Funeral - "Vobiscum Satanas"

Dark Funeral – “Vobiscum Satanas”

And you thought Revenge was a retarded one-trick pony of a band? Leave it to Dark Funeral to sound even more moronic than war metal. They are literally that dumb. Either them or their audience, I don’t know. Probably both.

The PR goes that Dark Funeral is the “upper echelon” of Swedish black metal, all the way up there with Marduk and Demonecromancy, and totally above shitty deathcore acts like Watain, but that’s the PR, not reality.

Back in the real world, it’s getting harder to distinguish Dark Funeral from Watain, as both are apparently in a contest to see which one can be more generic, derivative, unoriginal and uninspired than the other, while playing the most offensive of mallcore and calling it “black metal” just to rub it in further and add insult to the injury their mere presence inflicts upon the black metal genre.

And both their Hollywood “devil worship” lyrics are retarded beyond measure and only serve to tarnish the black metal genre by association. Nice copying Mayhem’s latin titles, just like those posers of Gorgoroth – also engaged in Hollywood satanism and homoerotic extra-musical activities, just like the male escort “Lord” Ahriman.

Oh, and no way Dark Funeral is “up there” with Marduk and Demonecromancy, even a drunk Marduk rehearsal in the woods would sound better than shit like Dark Funeral.

Goddamn, this is horrible! “Vobiscum Satanas” might even be more shitty than the ridiculous “The Secrets of the Black Arts,” a feat that shouldn’t even be possible.

Dark Funeral have to be the most overrated, piece of shit band in existence today, aside from the aforementioned Watain (and even then, their place in the hierarchy of shit is debated). Their lyrics are childish, their image retarded, and their music, if you can even call it music, downright pathetic. When I first heard the debut album “The Secrets of the Black Arts” I laughed I little and thought “how clever” for it was obvious to me, at the time, that this was a joke. There’s no way anyone could take their Necrophobic harmonic minor scale runs over monotonous drum machine blasting as “serious black metal” music. Well, it turns out I was wrong, but that also means that the studies indicating metalheads have normal IQ ranges relative to the general population are also wrong.

This album “Vobiscum Satanas” is just “song” after “song” of endless drum machine blasts (literally), monotonous, worthless, over-processed vocals, and horrible, uninspired riffs. There is no bass to be found anywhere. You can’t hear any riffs being played because of those goddamned drum machines, which dominate every song. There are no breaks in between all the blasting, and this release is just a fucking stupid joke.

The entire band Dark Funeral is a joke.

If you’ve ever read their interviews, you will know how stupid they are. I advise everyone to avoid this piece of shit band at all costs. Replace with what you want, as pretty much anything is better than Dark Funeral at this point. I recommend “Bestial War Metal,” “Under a Funeral Moon” or “Locked Up in Hell” – then again, anything is better than this shit “Vobiscum Satanas.”

Revenge - "Behold.Total.Rejection"

Revenge – “Behold.Total.Rejection”

Leave a comment
Revenge - "Behold.Total.Rejection"

Revenge – “Behold.Total.Rejection”

Ooooh, I get it. You saw me rip Black Witchery’s “Upheaval of Satanic Might” and “Inferno of Sacred Destruction” and you thought, hey, you’ve seen nothing of the shittiness of war metal, I’ll show you a band that makes Black Witchery sound like fucking Burzum.

Well, jokes on you because I already knew of the band. Their stupid Watain-like three word titles are a gimmick that, to say the least, doesn’t go unnoticed.

What I didn’t know, however, was how much Revenge sucked, both musically and artistically. Not only do they make Black Witchery look good, they might even make Archgoat look good. Fucking Archgoat.

That should be physically impossible and/or illegal, and yet Revenge has done it with “Behold.Total.Rejection” – an album supposedly about the vocalist’s boyfriend dumping him for Inferanus or whatever.

So there are a lot of reasons why “Behold.Total.Rejection” sucks, and many revolve around the drums. The drums are completely awful and they throw the whole album off track. The drum work consists almost entirely blast beats, and they are either ridiculously over-triggered or, more likely, Revenge is using a shit ass MIDI drum machine.

It is hard to find one point in this album where the drum machine isn’t constantly blasting away. Now a lot of black metal bands use a whole shitload of blast beats, Marduk and Mayhem come to mind, but at least those two mix it up from time to time, unlike these retards who apparently have never heard of the concept of variation, or heard about it one time but promptly dismissed it within a few minutes as “not br00tal enough.” As one can imagine this gets very annoying as the album goes on. Not only is the drumming (1) completely worthless, (2) fake ass MIDI shit, it is also (3) way too high in the mix, and (4) it drowns out, or crushes, the semi-random guitar “riff” things. Not sure they are even riffs to begin with.

The other really big problem with this album is that all the songs sound exactly the same. Not even somewhat the same, *exactly* note for note the same. The drumming always sounds the same (thanks MIDI drum machine). There is never anything that catches the listener’s ear, just a blur of low-fi noise and angry nu-male nu-metal shouting, also way too high in the mix. All this comes together to make “Behold.Total.Rejection” one boring, same-sounding, wreck of an album. This shit sounds more nu-metal than actual nu-metal.

“Behold.Total.Rejection” should serve as an example of how not to use blast beats. Every aspiring war metal musician should own a copy of this album, simply to remind themselves that blast beats can work for you, but when overused they can just as easily work against you. Also, this is an example of how NOT to play war metal. Basically don’t fulfill EVERY FUCKING STEREOTYPE of the genre, down to being literally retarded. Replace with “Onward to Golgotha” or “The Epilogue to Sanity” for actual, competently played blackened death metal (I doubt any of those two bands would want to be associated with the now ignoble “war metal” label).

Black Witchery - "Upheaval of Satanic Might"

Black Witchery – “Upheaval of Satanic Might”

Leave a comment
Black Witchery - "Upheaval of Satanic Might"

Black Witchery – “Upheaval of Satanic Might”

Yeah, so giving this band another try after “Inferno of Sacred Destruction” which I found, to be honest, rather boring. So this is what listening to “Upheaval of Satanic Might” made me think… war metal, why must you be so retarded?

In theory, war metal is just blackened death metal, only more primitive, influenced by Phantom and Incantation instead of Angelcorpse and Morbid Angel, and with that raw production and primitive, ritualistic feel that gives boners to fans of Von’s early demos and Phantom’s “Divine Necromancy.” But as they say, the difference between theory and practice is that in theory, there is no difference.

Case in point with “Upheaval of Satanic Might.” When I first listened to this album, I thought that it was pretty decent, at least better than “Inferno of Sacred Destruction” and Archgoat’s crap as you could actually hear the notes being played, so naturally I continued to listen to it, but after 10 minutes or so, something odd began to happen.

I realised upon giving the first few songs another listen that I did not enjoy them as much as I did the first time. They were still just this side of “okay” war metal but not nearly as passable as my first impression would have suggested. I repeated the experience, and started to seriously question my judgement after listening to the same song for the third time and finding it, far from passable, absolute shit.

What the hell happened?

The entire album “Upheaval of Satanic Might” got progressively worse with every listen, something which, in itself, is pretty strange because extreme metal is mostly known for its repeatability. I mean, that’s sort of the reason WHY we listen to extreme metal to begin with. Pop rock can be fun sometimes, but once you’ve heard one “hit” maybe two or three times, you never want to hear it again. Not true with extreme metal where, for example, any song from “Verminlust” or “Locked Up in Hell” can be listened to over and over again, and if anything they get progressively more enjoyable.

And yet, the opposite happened with “Upheaval of Satanic Might.”

By the end it was so bad that I couldn’t even make it all the way through the album, this is particularly bad considering the album is under 30 minutes long.

This has led me to believe that “Upheaval of Satanic Might” – and perhaps war metal in general – are not “extreme metal” in the strictest sense of the word. They don’t possess either black metal’s atmosphere or death metal’s complex narrative structures, so at the end you’re left with a very “br00tal” and “intense” form of… pop music.

That’s the best explanation I can come up with. Listening to Black Witchery produces the same effect as listening to Lady Gaga. Okay at first, annoying after a few spins. Replace with “Withdrawal,” “The Epilogue to Sanity” or anything from Demonecromancy.

Black Witchery - "Inferno of Sacred Destruction"

Black Witchery – “Inferno of Sacred Destruction”

Leave a comment
Black Witchery - "Inferno of Sacred Destruction"

Black Witchery – “Inferno of Sacred Destruction”

Eager with anticipation as I was, having heard many praise this Black Witchery band as the new Phantom, an actual “Phantaclone” done right, sort of like Demonecromancy and Sammath but even rawer, I absolutely had to listen to this. Most metalheads recommended “Inferno of Sacred Destruction” as their magnum opus, mostly because it was their last full-length release. Nevertheless, I had people who were saying how amazing this sounds and how everything works so well together, how finally war metal coming together to make coherent music, and how I had to pick this album up, etc… a huge hype surrounded this band, and still does to this day. And I’m here to tell you – nothing you read about them is even remotely true.

Black Witchery is “war metal coming together“? Then by all means, stay apart, as this is only ever so slightly less repetitive and annoying than your typical Archgoat chugga chugga crap.

And why do Phantaclone bands always copy the same album, “Divine Necromancy,” which is likely a joke album that Phantom just threw out on a whim anyway? Oh, right, because later Phantom actually requires talent. My bad.

Still, there’s like a million third-rate imitations of “Divine Necromancy” and not one of these Phantaclones ever even tries to copy “Fallen Angel” or “Withdrawal.” Pretty sad.

There are three major problems not only with “Inferno of Sacred Destruction” but with Black Witchery in general. And, in some ways, these three points also apply to the entire war metal scene. Without exception.

First and foremost, the guitar riffs and occasional leads don’t go anywhere, and if they do, they are sorely drowned out by the constant blast beats of the drum. The drummer’s continuous blast beating is one thing I have to give credit to, as it requires a lot of energy to maintain that (and at least Black Witchery doesn’t use a drum machine like that MIDI band Summoning), but even that gets drowned out when the “vocalist” – note the quotes because I use the term loosely – attempts to dole out the lyrics by turning every sound coming out of his throat into a random gargling that is both incomprehensible and identical to every other “vocal” moment, and to add insult to what sounds like a constipated pig griping because he can’t pass anything through his intestines, it’s featured so loudly in the mix that it drowns every else out.

To see what I mean, try pronouncing words like “blasphemous” or “God” – just to take an example from the lyrics of the first song. They are clearly different words, are they not? They don’t have the same syllables, they sound different, and are unmistakable from one another in normal, everyday conversation. Yet, on “Inferno of Sacred Destruction,” it seems like the singer is just randomly making noise so as to credit himself with “vocals” on the album booklet, and it’s entirely possible that the vocals have nothing to do with the lyric sheet as you can’t make out any word he’s saying, no matter how hard you try.

Oh, and the lyrics themselves are retarded. The same Gorgoroth feat Watain boilerplate of Hollywood “devil worship” scat-fetish. War metal for you, I guess copying Phantom’s lyrics was ALSO too much work.

When people tell me “vokills” are not that important on a war metal album, I understand the sentiment. But I also ask the question: why then was this album “Inferno of Sacred Destruction” recorded with the “vokills” so overwhelmingly dominant that you can’t even hear any of the other things that are supposed to make it good until the “GRAGRAGRAGRAGRA” stops?

The second major problem is that war metal in its entirety has gotten a negative connotation over its material because of bands like this. War metal is, generally speaking, a sub-genre of black metal (or death metal, depending on how you choose to see it). Thus, an art. It is something that requires time, sophistication and most of all, congruence.

Bands like Beherit, Demonecromancy, Sammath and Reiklos get this. Black Witchery throws all that out the window for one thing and one thing only: “BLASPHEMY!” A good war metal song has a lot of things that make it good – intense guitars, raw atmosphere, savage drumming and “vokills” done in balance. Listen to a band like Beherit – mostly on “Drawing Down the Moon” – for an example of this done right. Yes, it’s “brutal,” but it sure as hell has other things going for it than just “BLASPHEMY!” Black Witchery decided that blast beats and pig shit grunting was an acceptable substitute for any sort of technical aspect of the music. Does it work? For some people, but they’re not looking for good war metal… they’re just looking for a sub-culture, a “scene” in which they can “belong.”

Third, and last, is variety. What’s that, you might ask? It’s what separates one song from another. Black Witchery doesn’t have it. What it has is nearly 25 minutes of talking about killing Christians, fucking theirs corpses and other forms of torture and brutality to inflict on Jesus Christ. And to be honest, it gets tedious after a while. I know there’s shock value in saying it for a song or two, but when every song is like this, and the music is fucking indifferentiable from one song to the next, what’s to keep you from just downloading one track and playing it 10 times? Just download any one song of your choosing, because that’s the level of variety that you’re liable to get and you’ll save money in the process. There is nothing to differentiate, say “Holocaustic Church Devastation” from “Antichrist Order of Holy Death” from “Apocalyptic Carnage” from “Ascension of the Obscure Moon” or any of the other songs on this album. Literally, every song on this album sounds the same. That’s not just Black Witchery, by the way, that’s almost all modern war metal bands, from Archgoat to Goatwhore to everybody else. The SAME EXACT “MUSIC,” note for note.

All that makes me want to do is put on “Divine Necromancy” because, so long as we’re going to listen to repetitive, monotonous, low-fi “BLASPHEMY!!!!” under a sea of overpowering blast-beat insanity, I’d rather be able to tell one song apart from the next one. Not to mention that even on “Divine Necromancy” Phantom knew how to arrange their riffs in an interesting fashion. Black Witchery can’t do that, neither can Archgoatwhore and the rest of the try-hards (Conqueror, Revenge, Teitanblood, etc.).

In conclusion, if you get a boner by hearing “BLASPHEMY!!!!!” and want a band that is completely devoid of any technical aspects save the ability to blast-beat and grunt like a pig shitting its intestine over and over again, then by all means, get yourself a copy of “Inferno of Sacred Destruction,” turn it up late at night at full volume, and annoy your mother to no end. But if you want to hear some war metal/blackened death metal done right, avoid this album at all costs. Prefer Sewer’s “Birth of a Cursed Elysium,” Incantation’s “Onward to Golgotha” or, hell, even Phantom’s “The Epilogue to Sanity.”

Enslaved - "Vikingligr Veldi"

Enslaved – “Vikingligr Veldi”

Leave a comment
Enslaved - "Vikingligr Veldi"

Enslaved – “Vikingligr Veldi”

So, is Enslaved trying to sound like proto-war metal or what? Their debut album “Vikingligr Veldi” is often touted as their “only decent release” but even that saying is suspect, considering the music featured on this… thing… barely even manages to hold anyone’s interest for more than a few seconds before they doze off into deep sleep or just decide to cut the crap and turn off this boring shitfest. This criticism is oddly similar to that thrown at later Enslaved albums such as “Frost,” “Eld” and “E” for some reason. Could it be possible… no, it’s clearly not the c… but *hypothetically* could… no way, you gotta be serious in l… but what if it was, if not possible, perhaps conceivable, possibly, that maybe… Enslaved were NEVER good? That there’s no exact “moment” in time when they turned to shit because, essentially, they were always bad musicians? That’s just hypothesis, of course. Only an intellectual exercise… right?

Harsh as I may be with Enslaved and their “Vikingligr Veldi” abortion, there’s one thing positive I can say about this album. The lyrics and themes. Enslaved write about Vikings. Bravo.

No, seriously, I commend them for that. Where so many bands turn to retarded shock value subjects like “Hollywood Satanism” or retarded gore menstrual blood fetishism, at least Enslaved has interesting things to say about interesting subjects.

For that alone, they are kilometres above shitshows like Watain, Infernus’ Gorgoroth, Dark Funeral, Demonecromancy and Behemoth. Enslaved may be bad musicians, but they aren’t cucks who promote the “devil worship” media fallacy that has been used to smear ALL black metal bands by association.

So, ok, Enslaved’s music is pretty boring. But at least it’s still black metal, unlike so many of the “post-black metal” posers who try to shoehorn their shoegaze and alt rock with distortion into the black metal scene, ditto with the “orthodox black metal” tards who want their worthless nu metal to be recognised as “trve black metal” on par with the best of Darkthrone, Phantom and Burzum.

“Vikingligr Veldi” is a bloated black metal album, and it’s really not that hard to believe that it was recorded in an afternoon. Yes, there’s a lot “going on” on the surface, like on a busy subway station… but much like another overrated “legend” “Anthems to the Welkin at Dusk,” there’s really no thought whatsoever put into riff arrangement and song structure. Adding “soft” instrumentation like acoustics is a throwback to Bathory, and it’s a nice touch, but it gets old after three listens.

Enslaved is definitively better than 90% of modern “black metal” bands, if only for their non-retarded lyrics. But “Vikingligr Veldi” WILL put you to sleep, just like modern “black metal” music. Replace with Neraines’ “Yggdrasil” and Burzum’s “Hvis Lyset Tar Oss” for some non-boring black metal.

Carcass - "Surgical Steel" (This Album Sucks)

Carcass – “Surgical Steel” (Worse Than Nu Metal)

Leave a comment
Carcass - "Surgical Steel" (This Album Sucks)

Carcass – “Surgical Steel” (This Album Sucks)

Considering the depths one time member Carcass Mike Amott has fallen in recent times with his other band Arch Enemy, and the absolute shit quality of both bands’ outputs in the 90s – supposedly their “golden eras,” more like golden shower eras – it’s no surprise that this recent Carcass album is a deplorable, artistically void album that reeks of commercial whoredom.

Carcass were never talented musicians, but at least they never ADMITTED to playing nu metal for moshcore kids. They did it anyway, because when you can’t even play three notes on your guitar the only genre you’re left with, by process of elimination, is nu metal, but at the very least they had the basic human decency to LIE about playing nu metal.

“Reek of Putrefaction” was nu metal shit, “Symphonies of Sickness” was nu metal shit, “Necroticism” was boring nu metal shit, “Heartwork” was whoring nu metal shit and “Swansong” was a misdirected, genre confused cock rock abortion that somehow came to be know as, wait for it, goregrind… wait, what? No seriously, what’s left for Carcass, now that they’ve exhausted what little credibility as metal musicians they had?

Did you think “mix everything that made their 90s output forgettable and add in EVEN MORE NU METAL to further ruin their reputation?” Good thinking, that’s exactly what Carcass did with “Surgical Steel.”

From the misguided fan-service lyrics to the punk rock harmony 101 Saturday morning cartoon theme song riffs that are the focus of these pathetic excuses for tracks, this “Surgical Steel” album reeks of commercialism, talentlessness, try-hardism and vacuity.

The lyrics aren’t the worst thing on this album, that would be the music, but damn do they still suck big time in a not quite heterosexual orgy of fluids and feces. “The Granulating Dark Satanic Mills” olololol – it’s, like, so funny and shit. Like Sewer, but talentless.

From the cover art to the song titles, this is very inappropriate subject matter for the otherwise extremely shitty music. Violent themes for elevator muzak? Never heard that one before. It’s not like every nu metal band from Korn to Rage Against the Machine hasn’t tried to make their beta punk rock appear “more virile” with gratuitous references to murder, rape, Satan, gore, intestines, pedophilia and what not.

It seems like Carcass are trying to cash in on what people “think” they know about extreme metal – that being “gruesome themes with angry vocals” – but this whoring bunch of commercial Wacken beer metal retards doesn’t even realise that the band they are aping, Cannibal Corpse, not only plays better music than them, but are ALSO equally hated by actually metalheads… precisely because of their lyrics, that are said to “cheapen the genre” by association.

Just by reading the song titles, it feels like something a focus group put together to make the album appeal to fans of vastly different eras of death metal, but it fails, coming off as mere buzzwords thrown over muzak at the last minute. Which is probably not very far from the truth.

Muzakly speaking, this is “Heartwork” era nu metal meets stadium rock Gothenburg mellow-deaf with war metal chugging and butt rock solos that are so weak, lame and cheesy, it came as a surprise to find out Mike Amott had no part in this. There is more Wacken crowd pandering in here with the song structures being simple verse-chorus affairs, with the typical nu metal trope of “harsh verse / soft chorus,” but then they throw in these “unexpected” extended bridges in there to appeal to the people that thought “Ordo Ad Chao” era Mayhem’s bloated and unnecessarily long songs were “unique,” even if they don’t relate at all to what preceded them, to make it seem like something “complex” had just occurred in what is otherwise a simple three note punk rock song with a simple, cartoonish jingle-like melodic line over a vocally-led, cadenced and syncopated rhythmic groove.

Pantera would be so proud.

Who doesn’t like retards? You like retards, right? Only an evil neo-nazi KKK bigot would hate on retards, isn’t that true? So why not put even more retardness in your music? No? Does that mean you hate retards, you intolerant nazi shitbag? That’s better. Now, on to retard matters.

Fist in the air Wacken drunk stupidity, replete with down-picked power chord groove rock riffs aplenty, making this all feel like a more uptempo version of Pantera/Watain/Waking the Cadaver than the “Necroticism” meets “Heartwork” album the band promised. Occasionally, blast-beats can be heard over the punk rock meet screamo riffs, but only as something that feels forced, as if checked off a list of things that must be included on the album so people think “Surgical Steel” is “death metal” and not stadium rock.

The poor quality of this album was to be expected considering this band always sucked, like their gays cousins Napalm Death and Kreator. All three operated from the same label (Nuclear Blast). I wonder if there’s a pattern.

I wonder what they’ll do next, maybe form a supergroup with Jeff Walker, Erik Danielsson, Jonathan Davis, Infernus and Marilyn Manson, and call themselves the “true vanguard of extreme metal” or some equally retarded shit.

“Surgical Steel” is a joke, a literally worthless album from a worthless band.